Tonight I got to see some old friends and some old friends long gone. The church celebrates its Centennial this weekend with a various activities planned--drop in reception, dinner tonight, and special worship service tomorrow to name a few.
We attended the dinner. That was where we first got to connect with some friends. I got to see those friends we usually just see on Sundays. And I got to see one of my favorite people, Milly. She has not been able to get to church for awhile but special efforts were made for her to get there tonight.
She looked beautiful. I could tell that this was an important occasion for her and she wanted to look her best. (I understand that--I just put on and took off 3 outfits trying to find one that I liked for tonight.) Her hair looked lovely and the smile on her face lit the room.
Milly is one of the church members whose example I treasure. I remember (there was a lot of remembering going on tonight) her always being at church. She faithfully attended Wednesday nights as well as Sunday mornings. That in and of itself is worthwhile but she would also have her young granddaughters in tow. Wow! She did this from the time they were toddlers. She knew the importance of being in church so she made sure those little girls were too. Because of her, they grew up in the church.
Then I saw a girlfriend I hadn't seen in probably twenty years or so. We had gone to a NLR church together at the age of 5 and 6. She was a year older than me, but we spent many an afternoon together. We also attended Ouachita together. We lost contact with each other for several years and then, lo and behold, one weekend when I went to visit my parents in Fort Smith, I discovered that she and her husband and children lived just a few houses down the street from my parents.
Time went on. My friend moved; my parents moved. I hadn't seen her since, I don't believe. But I saw her tonight! It was great to catch up on her life. I have such fond memories of our friendship.
At the end of a delightful program highlighting the events over the last 100 years, there was a slide show. Some current church members--our friends--gave their reflections of the church. There were funny stories told; there were poignant testimonies shared. There was strength in their stories--the strength that this church needs now with enough to survive the future.
Then there were those slides from earlier generations--more friends--but long gone. These old friends had been pillars of this church. There was strength in their faces. They had grit. They had courage. They had skills. They had love and pride in their church. They provided what the church needed--some did the unseen things, the repairs, the care of the building; some were the teachers, the nursery workers; some were leaders in the community who had the courage to fight for civil rights.
They all were the backbone of the church; they lived their faith so loudly that the neighborhoods wanted to be a part of this church. It was the glory days of this church.
Time has changed the church in many ways. The pews aren't always filled; the dress is no longer your Sunday best; the songs are sometimes different. But the friends are there. Friends long gone are there in their supportive spirits. Love is there.
Tomorrow is Sunday. Those friends will be there. I'll be there as well.
Saturday, August 24, 2013
Forget School Supplies and Think Nora Ephron
“Don't you love New York in the fall? It makes me want to buy school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address.” --Nora Ephron
Whew! When I read that quote, I immediately felt better about my neck, myself, my silly attraction to school supplies and my previous lengthy post titled "School Supplies." After seeing the quote on a quest for something else (can't remember what now), I thought I would just edit that post, include the justifying quote, and then be on to something else.
Well, let's forget the editing of that post and just go on to something else...like Nora Ephron. Too bad there will be no more of her books and commentaries. I've read a lot of her work and still laugh and think about her quirky wisdom and advice. And yes, I do feel bad about my neck as most women of a certain age do, but I am glad about a woman such as Nora Ephron.
Not being able to spontaneously recite interesting or famous lines from books, movies, or even songs, I turned to Google, always the smartest thing in the room. (The husband is not here right now.)
I typed in "Nora Ephron quotes" and was successfully greeted by so many funny, thoughtful lines. I simply could not quit reading them, laughing and pondering them all. I won't copy and paste them all here; you can find them and enjoy them next time you're online. You will probably agree that an essay, or blog post, could be written on any one of them.
But the following lines of a dialogue in Ephron's movie/play, Heartburn, really spoke to me. I guess it's because I always seem to have a story. My niece used to grab the camcorder when I arrived at family gatherings, ask me something, and then start recording away. (Hmmm. I better find out what she did with those!) Anyway, maybe this is why I turn things into stories. How about you?
“Vera said: “Why do you feel you have to turn everything into a story?”
So I told her why.
Because if I tell the story, I control the version.
Because if I tell the story, I can make you laugh, and I would rather have you laugh at me than feel sorry for me.
Because if I tell the story, it doesn't hurt as much.
Because if I tell the story, I can get on with it.”
Friday, August 9, 2013
Talking
I recently saw a quote and illustration on a Kleenex box (of all places) that I thought was hilarious and probably more true than anyone would like to admit. The illustration was fine but it was the quote that got my attention.
Okay, I confess--I am guilty of that at times.
I'm sure if everyone was really honest they could remember some--maybe many--occasions in which this has happened.
It reminds me of an incident that occurred while I was director of a preschool. One morning a teacher came to my office during her break to tell me this absolutely precious story that happened earlier that morning during circle time with her class of three year olds.
I think the unit for the week was "Dinosaurs," and this superb teacher would have been presenting it in a totally awesome way as usual. After talking awhile about dinosaurs and getting the children interested by showing pictures and books, she noticed a little princess of a three year old with her hand waving fiercely in the air.
The teacher sweetly called on her, thinking the child was anxiously wanting to tell something she knew about dinosaurs or that she had a new cat or something equally important, but then to the teacher's great amusement, the little girl said with much exasperation, "Can we talk about me now?"
There you go. That says it all, right? It's funny and true. I think maybe the three year old child in all of us has experienced that desire from time to time. Then there are those adults who haven't grown past that stage. They keep the conversation centered on them. Some do it to the extent to make this following quote true:
Those people are tiresome. But there are those people that you don't ever get tired of listening to. Some people, such as my brilliant husband for one, are wonderful conversationalists. The husband can talk about anything with facts, history, and humor, so it is great fun to be a listener to a person like that.
But it is equally important and takes great skill to be a good listener. I've known both great conversationalists as well as great listeners. But I am now wondering how many people are excellent at both? Hmmm. Good question. (Husband, are you reading this? If so, then you are that person! kiss kiss)
We have all listened to great speakers. These are the speakers who keep you waiting for the next word or sentence. Listening to my brother-in-law is like that. He is enthralling. I never want to miss a word in any of his sermons or his conversations.
Brother-in-law is the exception. Many times listening can be hard. Have you ever "listened" to say--directions to some place (especially if someone else is also listening), the "specials" on the menu, or someone's latest "problem du jour" and afterwards realized that you had no idea what was just said. Or you just catch some of what was said? I hate when that happens.
I also hate when you are with someone who doesn't ever start a conversation. I've come to realize how important that is. In fact, I think I would rather have someone with me that talked all the time than one who never started a conversation.
I had an occasion with a non-starter recently. It was just the two of us and once I could start the conversation, it was fine. Lots of interesting information came out. Then a long pause...Think, think, think...what else can I ask? I didn't dare think about me (too much) during the conversation with that person because I was trying to listen to know what else I could ask. Whew! Let me just say, it is much easier to "talk about me!"
But come to think of it, who TALKS anymore anyway. Talking and listening may go the way of the hand-written letter. In fact, why talk when you can just text; why listen when you can just read. So go ahead and put that phone that you keep in your hand to good use and just text me. Then we both can text about ourselves!
Oh, wait--who texts first; do you have to put a smiley face in the text or respond with a K or respond at all? Do you abbreviate everything? Do you correct spelling? Do you include others in your message? Do you wait to text until the sun comes up? Do you LOL. Gee--Forget it--Just call me. I'll be glad to listen to you talk about yourself (while I think about myself!)
ADBB4N
--in case you don't text much and would not ever know what that meant unless you googled it like I just did, it says, "All done. Bye Bye for Now." I think all I would have figured out is the 4!
"I hear what you are saying, but I'm thinking about myself."
Okay, I confess--I am guilty of that at times.
I'm sure if everyone was really honest they could remember some--maybe many--occasions in which this has happened.
It reminds me of an incident that occurred while I was director of a preschool. One morning a teacher came to my office during her break to tell me this absolutely precious story that happened earlier that morning during circle time with her class of three year olds.
I think the unit for the week was "Dinosaurs," and this superb teacher would have been presenting it in a totally awesome way as usual. After talking awhile about dinosaurs and getting the children interested by showing pictures and books, she noticed a little princess of a three year old with her hand waving fiercely in the air.
The teacher sweetly called on her, thinking the child was anxiously wanting to tell something she knew about dinosaurs or that she had a new cat or something equally important, but then to the teacher's great amusement, the little girl said with much exasperation, "Can we talk about me now?"
There you go. That says it all, right? It's funny and true. I think maybe the three year old child in all of us has experienced that desire from time to time. Then there are those adults who haven't grown past that stage. They keep the conversation centered on them. Some do it to the extent to make this following quote true:
Those people are tiresome. But there are those people that you don't ever get tired of listening to. Some people, such as my brilliant husband for one, are wonderful conversationalists. The husband can talk about anything with facts, history, and humor, so it is great fun to be a listener to a person like that.
But it is equally important and takes great skill to be a good listener. I've known both great conversationalists as well as great listeners. But I am now wondering how many people are excellent at both? Hmmm. Good question. (Husband, are you reading this? If so, then you are that person! kiss kiss)
We have all listened to great speakers. These are the speakers who keep you waiting for the next word or sentence. Listening to my brother-in-law is like that. He is enthralling. I never want to miss a word in any of his sermons or his conversations.
Brother-in-law is the exception. Many times listening can be hard. Have you ever "listened" to say--directions to some place (especially if someone else is also listening), the "specials" on the menu, or someone's latest "problem du jour" and afterwards realized that you had no idea what was just said. Or you just catch some of what was said? I hate when that happens.
I also hate when you are with someone who doesn't ever start a conversation. I've come to realize how important that is. In fact, I think I would rather have someone with me that talked all the time than one who never started a conversation.
I had an occasion with a non-starter recently. It was just the two of us and once I could start the conversation, it was fine. Lots of interesting information came out. Then a long pause...Think, think, think...what else can I ask? I didn't dare think about me (too much) during the conversation with that person because I was trying to listen to know what else I could ask. Whew! Let me just say, it is much easier to "talk about me!"
But come to think of it, who TALKS anymore anyway. Talking and listening may go the way of the hand-written letter. In fact, why talk when you can just text; why listen when you can just read. So go ahead and put that phone that you keep in your hand to good use and just text me. Then we both can text about ourselves!
Oh, wait--who texts first; do you have to put a smiley face in the text or respond with a K or respond at all? Do you abbreviate everything? Do you correct spelling? Do you include others in your message? Do you wait to text until the sun comes up? Do you LOL. Gee--Forget it--Just call me. I'll be glad to listen to you talk about yourself (while I think about myself!)
ADBB4N
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